- It [I-80] begins at the Missouri River in Council Bluffs and heads east through the southern Iowa drift plain: no, it doesn't, it just enters Iowa there. Consider rephrasing.
- There was another I-80 begins further down. I changed that one as well. –Fredddie™
- Before I-80 was ever planned, the route between Council Bluffs and Davenport, which passed through Des Moines, was vital to the state.: Perhaps it would be better to remove "ever". You might want to remove "vital to the state"; it's a hard statement to justify, and while the attempt is made to justify it with the bit about the auto trails, it doesn't necessarily follow that they were vying to serve the route because it was vital. (The route could have been unimportant but been a strategic connection to other trails, for example).
- I removed ever, but I think the vital statement should stay. Omaha/Council Bluffs, Des Moines, and the Quad Cities are major areas (as far as Iowa is concerned), so it could be my Iowa bias talking, but how could connecting three major areas not be vital? –Fredddie™
- The third paragraph of the lead refers to I-80 several times without specifying I-80 in Iowa. While it is intended to be understood that each reference is meant to be I-80 in IA, sentences like The final piece of I-80, the Missouri River bridge to Omaha, Nebraska, opened on December 15, 1972 are without context wholly incorrect.
- Added context to the quoted sentence. –Fredddie™
- In the 1980s, I-80 was rebuilt in Iowa and across the country. Why are we talking about what's happening in other states again? Was I-80 rebuilt in Iowa as part of some interstate "Let's Redo I-80" coalition? If not, why bother mentioning what was happening in other states?
- Because it was a BFD. It actually talks more about this later in the article. –Fredddie™
- The majority of the highway runs through farmland, yet roughly one-third of Iowa's population live along the I-80 corridor. This is an outstanding sentence. You might want to find a way to move it to the lead to entice readers into reading further to find out how this is the case.
- After which, the interstate leaves Council Bluffs and speed limits rise to the rural limit of 70 mph (110 km/h). I nearly mistook this for a sentence fragment; remove "after which" or combine this sentence with the previous one.
- Removed. –Fredddie™
- CR G30, the White Pole Road, was the original alignment of US 6, while CR N54 carried US 6 has not carried US 6 since 1980. Has US 6 ever really decided to want to go to do look more like?
- My guess is that when one really been far even as decided once to use even go want, it is then that he has really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like. It’s just common sense. –Fredddie™
- More later... —Scott5114↗ [EXACT CHANGE ONLY] 08:45, 23 September 2012 (UTC)
- If I haven't replied to a bullet point, I haven't looked at it yet. –Fredddie™ 17:54, 23 September 2012 (UTC)
Some more comments:
- I'm not so sure the construction is a BFD. The article reads more as though the I-80 corridor simply fell victim to a number of construction projects in a number of states unfortunately happening to coincide, rather than Iowa participating in a concerted effort to rebuild the highway from coast to coast. If the latter were the case, I'd have no problem with including it, but as it stands now, those facts probably should be moved to the main I-80 article.
- I don't doubt that it should be in the main I-80 article. –Fredddie™
- I found a comma splice and fixed it. For future reference in case I miss any (and since I've found that the semicolon is the punctuation mark most people are least familiar with, sadly), that's when you use a comma when you mean to use a semicolon. Semicolons basically separate two complete sentences that have been combined into one because they make closely related points. To determine which to use—mentally break the sentence at the comma. If both sentences could theoretically stand on their own (i.e. are not fragments), use a semicolon; if one or both are now fragments, the comma is appropriate. (See how the semicolon worked there?)
- You seem to be preaching to the choir. I know how semicolons work. –Fredddie™
- Four miles (6 km) to the east is Iowa 415 and a one mile (2 km) further east is US 69. Did you accidentally a word?
- Wait, a that's a wrong? –Fredddie™
- Between the river and the Iowa 146 exit south of Grinnell, the farmland that surrounds the interstate undulates. Correct and you shouldn't change a thing, but I had to point out that this sentence made me giggle for some reason.
- Further east and seemingly in the middle of nowhere, at exit 201 for Iowa 21, there are competing truck stops on either side of the freeway. A hotel is located on the northern side of the interstate.[3] Who does it seem to be the middle of nowhere to? You? Joe Biden? This sort of thing is what, in my experience, FAC reviewers love to pounce on as being unverifiable/non-neutral/weasel wording/you name it. Either drop the "middle of nowhere" or ditch the entire bit about the truck stops entirely if you feel it's not interesting enough to have the truck stops mentioned without the novel fact that they're in the middle of nowhere.
- Thanks for finally giving a solid reason to revise the sentence. I want to get the gist of the sentence, that truck stops are normally closer to civilization than both of these and the hotel are, across to the reader. I'll take suggestions. –Fredddie™
- I don't think it's quite so novel as you might think; I've run into several interchanges that serve rural roads that just happen to have randomly become major commerce centers because of competing truck stops or hotels (I suspect that Michael might be staying at a similar interchange right now, for instance). However, if you are dead set on including it, you could give the distance and population to the nearest incorporated place, or you could give the population density of the surrounding county or township. Both of those are verifiable. (Keep in mind that someone from a place like Boise City, Oklahoma would probably have a much higher bar for "the middle of nowhere" than you do, and someone from New York City would probably consider Des Moines the middle of nowhere.) —Scott5114↗ [EXACT CHANGE ONLY]
- On the edge of Coralville is an interchange with US 218 and Iowa 27, the Avenue of the Saints highway, that also represents the beginning of I-380, which heads north along US 218 and Iowa 27 towards Cedar Rapids and Waterloo. This is not technically a run-on sentence, but it is sort of confusing as currently structured since the first clause is about the interchange, the second is about IA 27, the third is about the interchange again, and the fourth is about I-380. Three subjects is probably a bit much for one sentence. It would be simplest to split it into two, sticking the first period after highway and replacing that with something along the lines of This interchange, but if you want to get clever, you could also probably work up something using parenthesis.
- I hate using parentheses to separate text from the rest of the sentence. How is that instead? –Fredddie™
- Great! —Scott5114↗ [EXACT CHANGE ONLY]
- You might want to fill in the Herbert Hoover Highway article before taking this to FA. I don't know how FAC feels these days about red links, but back in the days of yore I remember getting razzed about having them on the either the Kansas Turnpike FAC or the preceding PR.
- Acknowledged. –Fredddie™
- The I-80 / I-380 interchange was identified as the most likely location in Iowa for a semi-trailer truck to overturn. Another fascinating fact that you might want to find a way to work into the lead. Dramatize!
- Before I-80 can reach the Quad Cities, it has to pass Walcott and Iowa 80, the World's Largest Truckstop. This is a dirty lie. I-80 doesn't HAVE to pass the truck stop; IaDOT could build a bypass if they wanted to! Also, if this is legitimately the world's largest truck stop, that shouldn't be capitalized, but if it's billed as being such, you should probably say so and include quotes.
- Made it so. –Fredddie™
- Who does the "Big X" confuse? Me? Lizard People? Joe Biden? You need a reliable source to show that it's considered confusing, and by who (the citation given does not mention the X as being particularly confusing). You have a citation there to a IaDOT guide sign (careful! might be considered an unreliable source/SPS since it's Flickr; people have doctored Flickr roadsign photos before!); that doesn't necessarily show that IaDOT put those signs up because of confusion. It could be part of a scheme to try to manage traffic levels, for instance.
- Aha! The Big X reference was for the Big X name. I'll try to find something that shows that the interchange is really confusing. The short-short version is this: it's a TOTSO for both I-74 and I-80. –Fredddie™
- You might want to just describe the TOTSO then. That way the reader can decide if it sounds confusing themselves. (Personally, I don't find them confusing, but I'm a roadgeek, so I guess that's to be expected.) —Scott5114↗ [EXACT CHANGE ONLY]
- I'm starting an article on the Big X. I think the controversy from Illinois trying to renumber it gives it notability. I also added a little bit more in this article. –Fredddie™ 23:55, 2 October 2012 (UTC)
- WP:USRD/STDS provides for a Services section, but shows that it should be a separate section, not part of the RD. Are you just WP:IARing here because of the short section?
- I re-read WP:USRD/STDS. It specifically says that it can go in the RD if it's a short section. So we're good there. –Fredddie™ 14:53, 25 September 2012 (UTC)
- The US 32 designation did not last long. Rather than saying it "didn't last long", state how long it lasted and let the reader realize that's not very long for a highway to exist.
- I revised the sentence and corrected the split infinitive. –Fredddie™
- If you can find a cite for it, you might want to state whether the research that went into the Iowa Turnpike was ever applied to I-80. A similar situation existed in Oklahoma with I-35; Oklahoma was stalled in that case by a poor credit rating, so when the Interstate act rolled around OTA just turned over all the plans and the land they'd acquired to the Department of Highways. Including this would lend continuity between the Iowa Turnpike section and the next.
- I might have to take a trip to the DOT library for this one. –Fredddie™
- Are "east mixmaster" and "west mixmaster" proper names? If so, they should be capitalized. If not, they're slang and should be excised.
- I wouldn't call them slang. They are commonly used by TV news and the newspaper to denote which I-35/I-80 junction is which. Hell, one even has a Foursquare page. –Fredddie™
- If it's a name in popular usage, still include it, but capitalize it, as even unofficial names are proper names. Without the capitalization it looks like you're intending "mixmaster" to be a synonym for "interchange". —Scott5114↗ [EXACT CHANGE ONLY]
Overall this is a pretty good article and represents a lot of good research. The issues I've identified are mostly stylistic and mechanical in nature and shouldn't be too hard to fix. You definitely have a case for taking this article to FAC after clearing this venue. —Scott5114↗ [EXACT CHANGE ONLY] 15:39, 24 September 2012 (UTC)
- First off, thanks for the review. Second, I have either tried to explain my way out of making changes or actually made the changes. I will continue to work on the suggested changes. –Fredddie™ 00:39, 25 September 2012 (UTC)
Since I took a small break in the middle of this review, could you revisit this and remind me what needs to be done? I know I need to fix the middle of nowhere stuff. –Fredddie™ 01:43, 5 October 2012 (UTC)
- Clean up the "middle of nowhere" sentence.
- Clean up the Big X stuff (specifically, remove the assertion that it is confusing).
- Capitalize all occurrences of the "East (West) Mixmaster" term, as it appears to be a proper name.
When these issues are fixed I would be happy to support. —Scott5114↗ [EXACT CHANGE ONLY] 03:29, 9 October 2012 (UTC)
- OK, how does that look? –Fredddie™ 00:26, 13 October 2012 (UTC)
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